Sunday, May 17, 2009

Mr. Wrong

You know me...I kick men in the ass. It's my role.

But every now and again...ok for the first time, um I mean the second, I slip up.

I got my ass kicked. Yep. I did. You must, if nothing, admire my perplexing honesty. Honesty is bravery.

"You know who" left me in ANOTHER restaurant.

I was standing there after he departed, other men circled like sharks... inching closer and closer. I could see the optimism in their eyes. "Now I'll get my chance", thought Bachelor number one. He walked up with nothing but compassion and hope while extending his hand. Tears welled up in my eyes. I couldn't see.

I rushed out the door to chase after Mr. Wrong.

I cried in the parking lot. But here's the good news: There IS good news. I'm not remotely embarrassed, although I should be.

I get to have feelings. I wasn't actually sure I had them anymore because I've been kicking so much man-ass I'd forgotten...what it feels like to actually care.

For the record, caring sucks. That is, if you have the misfortune to care for Mr. Wrong.

He thought he humiliated me. He set me free instead AND made an ass of himself in the process. You think other people weren't watching when he left? They were watching all right. He didn't damage my reputation. He damaged his own.

You'd think I'd be hating men...but I don't. It's quite the reverse. This episode merely crystallizes how well I've been loved in the past. What's a little heartbreak after all these years?

Lastly, allow me to apologize for the "Wham" link below. Don't deprived yourself. Check out the bass player.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1ECnQ5EOWg

18 comments:

JIMSIGHT said...

WTF??? Um I am guessing you must have canceled on the artist dude, Sharks at the QW..hmmmm the way I remember the Quiet Woman is the guys that frequent might want to do his hair or nail badly but...oh that's right he's bald.. well um. maybe they could give him a bad massage or something..

Charmaine said...

Jim,

I know. See, I had a problem. I had the unique experience of never having been treated badly by a man before, ever.

When you have been treated badly, you appreciate the good guys.

But that was not my experience. I thought all men were good.

You get to watch me making up for lost time. I'm glad I did it now that I'm older. In my youth I was way too sensitive...I never would have survived.

All of this madness, all of the pain and whatever...it works itself out in the end.

Bad massage? I'm thinking more like an upper cut to the chin.

:-)

Senorita said...

Wow, I'm sorry that happened to you.

Yes it does suck when you care for Mr. Wrong. I've been guilty of that.

I'm glad that he ended up humiliating himself and helping liberate you in the process.

Ann Imig said...

Its stunning--if in a painful way--when people reveal themselves like that. So completely.

Unreal.

What a dick.

♥ Braja said...

Poor baby. Come here, I'll cuddle you and then...ok then we'll go out and get an ice cold champagne and put this behind us while we shop on Wilshire...ok honey? :)

Everyday Goddess said...

I am glad you feel liberated. He sounds like a real turd.

SweetPeaSurry said...

Men are jerks! But the guy I've been after for a while (online dating rules!!!) actually phoned me ... the night before last. I think I'm in LURVE!!! LOL

Neither Here Nor There said...

Yeah, I'm hitting 40 soon and just starting to learn about dealing with emotions. For the first time, I'm not just walking away with a "screw you" attitude. Really sucks to allow yourself the vunerability but it's also good......So I hear :)

Pearl said...

He walked out of the restaurant?! What a shit!
At least you found out early. Still, I'm with you -- when you're accustomed to being treated well, when you meet someone who treats you badly, it's almost unbelievable...

Pearl

namaste said...

dating completely sucks! you have to sift thru sooo many losers to get to a good guy.

thank god he revealed himself (again) for the jerk he is and liberated you.

charmaine, you fall down and keep getting back up. and i think your honesty is beyond brave, it's kick-ass and inspiring!

;)

~maria

LL said...

*sigh* Dammit Charm... you knew better. That doesn't seem to help much though, does it.

Take what you can from the experience... leave the rest.

webberpa said...

George Michael was alright, until I found out he was friggin GAY; and like stalking in the bathroom GAY to boot! Sick, sick, sick...like your dates! Whats up wit dat? Dude ditched you TWICE in one lifetime? I think you are in need of a good spankin, because you must be a bad girl! Quit going on dates with loooo-zzzers! Maybe you can just go to Craigs list and get a good one that wont ditch you after dinner.

Michelle said...

Charmaine,

M loves you still!!

Just FYI!!!

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear he ditched you like that a second time...

Well...it's one for the lesson books..yes there are men out there that are complete asses...we all really do no that..

But then there are those that are very good men.

I ran into a few asses before I decided I wasn't going to take it anymore and be treated so badly..and yes, I stopped looking to date..until I met my you know who!!

And yes, Online dating does work sometimes....My oldest daughter met her now husband online...awesomeness.....and he's very, very good to her...

Don't give up Charmaine..which I'm sure you won't..but leave that scumbag behind you!!

Don said...

You've NEVER been badly treated before? OMG, I think that might truly be unique (a much overused word). Sorry it is happening to you though.

I must admit that I have been badly treated by women but also that I have treated a woman badly (not the same one!). We are all human and don't always take the high road.

lisahgolden said...

He's no man. He's a drama queen. Best to be rid of him before he really drives you crazy.

Paul Eilers said...

I had to read this post a couple of times to get it. But hey, I'm blond, okay?

I still remember the summer when I was in the second grade. I was in the swimming pool with a bunch of friends, when for reasons I cannot remember, my 13 year old female babysitter scratched my sunburn.

I hauled off and hit her pretty good!

Later that evening, I received a stern lecture from my parents, that under no conditions was I to ever hit a girl. Then I got the spanking of my life!

There have been more than a few times when I have had to interact with a woman who is rude, an ass, or threatening. But then that childhood memory rises to the surface, and I grit my teeth and turn the other cheek.

It is not always easy being a southern gentleman.

Regardless of what has been going on between you and Mr. Wrong, he should always, always treat you with respect and dignity as well as be concerned for your safety and well being.

Paul

Eat Well. Live Well.
PurpleGreenPops.com

Simplicity said...

You're fortunate. I'm an emotional wreck and don't apologize for it. I am the opposite of you in that I am aware that men can treat women badly and yet I still give them a chance! It's mostly because I know some fan-dam-tastic men and I keep hoping I will actually meet a single one! Or single fan-dam-tastic woman. Whichever these days! ;)

I'm sure you hear this a lot, but, how are you still single?!?