Friday, April 18, 2008

Break Up - Extension

Bad Boy Gone Good insisted on speaking with me about our breakup. He had some points. He talked until my phone battery died.

Today he arrived on my doorstep with a new phone and a scented candle. I've decided to give him one more date. I know I know. First impressions should not be ignored.

But one more date won't kill me.

Of course, he's the dude with the guns so... if I don't show up for work and the murder weapon is a 9 mm please bring his photo (below) to the police.

Seriously, I can make a man MAD.

I can't reach out from the grave but I can reach out from the blog with your help.

Groan.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Break Up - Part 2


Bad Boy Gone Good showed up at my work yesterday with these flowers, a book, senior citizen mints and two cards. One said, bumpy road ahead and the other said that he was nuts about me.

He delivered them himself. (Always embarassing). I walked him out of the office and we sort of talked, but not really. He looked really handsome . I sort of began regretting everything....

So he's back on match.com, I'm back on match.com...I just don't get why he brought the gifts?
Was it to proove that contrary to my accusations he wasn't cheap?

Men.

The Break Up

As you can imagine, I sent quite the email to Bad Boy Gone Good after our third date.

Hi Bad Boy Gone Good,

I had a great time with you today. Thank you.

I need to say that I was taken aback my your remark “The least you could do is buy me lunch”. It sort of killed my budding romantic feelings. You saved 40 bucks, but lost more. Namely me.

I have never paid for lunch or dinner when on a date. You’re response was, “don’t you want to contribute?”

My delayed response is yes, but not on the third date.

Hw shot back with an arsenal.

So, I replied:

Dear Bad Boy Gone Good,

I disagree with everything you just said.

If you can't afford to date, don't date. Better yet, get a job.

You seem to feel that I am renting your time and that it has economic value necessitating that I pay for what we do in order to "contribute".

You're too old to be a gigalo.

PS: Please don't shoot me. I've seen your aim, and it's good.

So h'es calling, and calling and calling....I'm ignoring, ignoring and ignoring....

Monday, April 7, 2008

Match.com Dangers

It finally happened.

What we single broads dread and simulateously believe will never happen.

A match.com man, one I decided NOT to meet just showed up on my doorstep univited. He drove for several hours to get there. (I had cancelled our first date)

The excuse was that he had a book to give me.

I said, "I don't know how you got my address but obviously you have it so why didn't you just mail it"?

(I guess some questions are irrelevant).

I took the book, sent him on his way. Then I made sure to remove my address from the white pages.

Now on to more blissfull dating.

Use of the term blissfull...that was sarcasm. In case you're new to the blog. If you are new that means you are my 3 rd reader.

Defcon 4

You may notice some "holes" in my recent dating blog. The truth is, the man I am knows how to google. (Alot of the men I date still have VCR's. )

If you google me just right, you'll find where I work, associations I belong to and yes....the blog.

If he HAD googled me, please lord never let him google me, he would have been reading about himself right NOW. In case you haven't noticed, I'm not always....nice. So I hid the last three entries. (They're back up...see Worst Date I ever Loved...coming soon.

Sound the alarms Wir...Wir.....We are now at Defcon 4. Measures have been taken to protect the guilty.

This is war, man.