Sunday, June 14, 2009

The Last Date

"The King of Produce", renamed "The Escape Artist", sent this picture from our final date (where he left me in Long Beach) .The sad thing is he was the one who kissed correctly. A great kiss can shadow misdeeds. Just not THIS many.
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He attempted to re-open communication emailing something about sending Peonies (my favorite flower). Then he announced they were "out of season". If EVER there was a time to follow through, this was it.
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I shot back; "Tell the Peonies on my desk they're out of season". I further explained:
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"You can't even open a car door for a lady for fear it will compromise your masculinity. If you sent me flowers, surely you would be impotent within hours?"
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"The Gardener" forever re-named "The Playboy" since he lost ALL interest in gardening and replaced it with a singular interest in trying to separate me from my clothing, took me to breakfast and tried to hook up my digital converter. It didn't work. He left to watch the Laker game with his pal.
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The man has skills. You know the type; they grab your hair when they kiss you.
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I'll be bald by the Fourth of July if I don't end things.

17 comments:

LL said...

I'm hoping you cropped the pic and he didn't just send you one of himself and half of you. 'Cause that would be... well...

As for the playboy... sweet and cute only goes so far because both can change rather rapidly. You need to start taking an interest in sports... :P

Charmaine said...

LL- You are so my man. heh heh. I don't care about his interests.

I know when a man loves me. Don't think, for one minute, I will settle.

I'm just giving myself, VERY temporary permission to do what most people have done in youth.

You have no idea what a prude I've been my entire life.

Mrs. K said...

I just think this pics speaks VOLUMES! as in ENCYCLOPEDIC VOLUMES! He cropped what he things his shortcoming is (no hair)- he is perfectly centered in the picture- you are sadly, almost out of the picture.

Stay focused in that fact Ms C! :)

SweetPeaSurry said...

Ooooh ... you should have been in my office today, Charmaine. 15 hunky gorgeous firemen came up to treat a fabulous lady that I work with. Since I work in the geriatric wing at this here Railroad, I was the youngest of the bunch here ... I'm all a flutter!

What ever happened to the surfer dude?

SweetPeaSurry said...

Oh ... and a male collegue of mine has promised to phone up the fire-house and find out where these boys party after work! Heh!

I'm gonna be a fireman stalker in NO time!

Charmaine said...

Sweet Pea - What IS it about firemen? God love them.

Evil Surfer calls almost every day and leaves a messsage. 50% of them are disturbingly insulting and 50% of the time he begs me to come back.

I'm not going back. No way.

Charmaine said...

For the record peeps, I took that photo. There was no intentional cropping of anything...just bad aim.

namaste said...

"if you sent me flowers, surely you would be impotent within hours?"

yes! good for you on sending that zinger! i was never good at giving those one-liners to men.

i once dated a guy that was allergic to all things romantic. he thought it made him look like a wuss. and i myself was too wussy to be snide with him.

yay for you for sending that zinger!

f1trey said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
f1trey said...

Just a thought... I know it makes you feel good to send a well deserved zinger but I tell no lies...apathy is the way to go..... no response at all rivals a scorned womans fury.

Charmaine said...

f1trey - I know you are right. But at the end of the day, it doesn't matter anyway. Zinger or no zinger...it still ends the same so...why not let a zinger fly?

Further, look at Evil Surfer Dude. I totally ignore him. So what do I get? I get his ENDLESS attempts to recontact me.

I've concluded, if you want a guy back...ignore him.

High Desert Diva said...

Pics of the interior: before & after are on the blog in the left side bar...look for the trailer trash pic

Did I mention I'm a Pisces, too, and I'm currently event planning? Freaky.

The Other Charmaine

Amanda said...

I have a hard time resisting throwing out the zingers myself...but this one keeps coming back. Some men are just masochistic! I suspect "The Escape Artist" may be one. These men also tend to want, but won't do the work to get what they want...just want it handed to them. It's our duty to make them work or make sure they don't get it :)

Lisa said...

Boy didn't we all zero in on the same thing with the photo. Watch the Playboy's hands. Clothing can be replaced either than hair can. I think.

Loving Annie said...

"He attempted to re-open communication emailing something about sending Peonies (my favorite flower). Then he announced they were "out of season". "

Charmaine... Totoally unacceptable behavior on his part.

This was not an apology.

It wasn't even a phone call. It was the even more distant/emotionally disconnected form of communication, an e-mail.

In fact, what he said in it was an insult and cheap.
He's THINKING of sending you flowers, but then says they are out of season, so he can't - when in fact, they ARE in season and he could have.

So he feels he has done nothing wrong, and in you responding at all to his communication, (even in a withering manner) it lets him off the hook completely and he feels the door is open again.

Do NO CONTACT with jerks like him, Charmaine.

He doesn't deserve to have his communications answered in any way, shape or form.

He treated you badly, and has voiced no intention to do otherwsie, nor shown by his actions that he IS doing otherwise.

Hope you don't EVER kiss him again. Except to kiss him off by ignoring him completely.

Senorita said...

Oh yeah, good kissers are dangerous.

I agree with Loving Annie.

He is not sorry, and I think you should've not replied to him at all. Nothing good can come from communicating with him and you're just wasting your energy.

There must be other good kissers out there that don't leave you in a bad area.

PaulsHealthBlog.com said...

"I'll be bald by the Fourth of July if I don't end things."

Even your extensions, Charmaine? :)

Paul

Eat Well. Live Well.
PurpleGreenPops.com