This is the 8th day of coughing like a 400-lb cigar smoking truck driver. I'm sexy like that.
I was shocked to learn the thermometer revealed I did not have a temperature. Then I had another shock. My thermometer is a rectal thermometer. I thought "bigger was better".
I have a disgusting, keep-the-neighbours-awake-at-night cough. I don't have the energy to put on make-up, take a shower or leave the house.
When evening rolls around I am coughing so vigorously (and repulsively) I think I'm going to be ill.
After strolling down this road before (it turned out to be Pneumonia) I've have the following courses of action:
1. Ignore it.
2. Enter into a loveless marriage to obtain health insurance.
3. Pretend my last name is Gonzales (I'm really sorry about this one folks) and go to the Emergency Room.
4. Shoot myself in the head.
Please cast your vote for the preferred treatment.