Thursday, August 7, 2008

Surfer Dude - Improved Version

We met at Javiers at Crystal Cove, CA. The man was FINE.

I was late. He had already ordered my favorite wine, Cakebread Chardonnay.

He was dressed superbly. I suspected, I had a rich man on my hands.

Sadly, I had decided to wear my "look-at-me-I'm-a-prostitute" 4 inch heels. I was almost as tall as him.

The conversation did not flow perfectly. It was very loud for a Wed. night. He had a VERY dry sense of humor. This means when he's being funny, he does so with a straight face. Since I don't know him, I couldn't tell when he was joking. (He said something about being poor white trash).

Given the clothing, blue oxford shirt, reddish tie roughishly askew and tan very thin pants he was not poor white trash. But hell, I didn't know. He made another joke about being in prison. I didn't laugh cuz I was trying to be understanding.

I thought I looked good. So good that I actually stopped on the way to get my passport picture taken.

I noticed, looking at my picture, that the events of the past few months have aged me. Maybe it's the jogging. But I have definite jowels and discernable wrinkles.

Still I looked good enough to garner some stares from a few young men at the table behind my date. (Or maybe they were just looking at my jowels.) My date never told me I looked nice.

We had two glasses of wine. This set him back 100 bucks. He laughed at my jokes. Told me I was a very funny woman. I could barely hear him. It was frustrating.

He made a comment about how I was sitting so far away. But he did not encourage me to sit closer.

After our two drinks we left. As I waited for the valet he turned to me and said, "Do you want to make history?" I guess I made a strange face. He said, "why did you just get scared now?"

What did that mean? Was he going to ask me to dinner and my bolting-like behavior sent the wrong message? Was he asking if I wanted to become the first female president?

He walked me to my car. I went to hug him and he said, "Oh no, you're not going to hug me". I did. Then drove off.

That night he sent me an email that said, "You lived up to your namesake". My profile name on plentyoffish is Charming Mary.

But the dude did not ask me out again.

Oh but...the evil Surfer Dude just sent me flowers.

6 comments:

Stephanie said...

Haha - well he sure pegged previous surfer-boy!!

Good looking, rich, funny... sounds good! Why do you say you didn't nail it?! You never know . . . and if not, let's be honest here - despite being rich and goodlooking, he probably doesn't deserve you.

Good looking men make me nervous too. :) Actually, so do good looking women. Apparently I just have an inferiority complex.

Markitos said...

Ha !! I don't klnow how I got to this blog but...... I like your honesty...M.

Michelle J said...

So, what do you think he meant when he asked you if you want to make history? I can't seem to figure that out myself???

Jowels?? Come on your beautiful...no Jowels on you, about you, behind you, in you, hmmm you get the picture!!??

Briana said...

Maybe he was making reference to the quote "Well-behaved women seldom make history."

Slyde said...

that is just out and out bizarre behaviour.

what did he mean by the "history" comments? was he asking you for a first-date fling, or was it something weirder that im just not getting...?

P.O.M. said...

Oh dear. I seriously hate dating and reading your blog makes me hate it even more.