Rent Me.

Due to these hard economic times, I had to lower my rates.

During a mid-life crisis, I dyed my hair brown.  Considering my new career path... should I have opted for blond?

My hair color is as unstable as Uranium.

Trying to "act sexy" when uptight AND of Irish descent sitting on a van bumper in a neighbourhood where drug deals were taking place...was no easy task.  Did I mention "unstable"?

What was I doing there?  Oh, you know...just advertising picking up a piece of furniture.  I was with "The King".  Unlike most men, he likes to read about himself in my blog.  Most men go ballistic. (Like their mother is reading my blog.)

Talk about a guilty conscious.

Speaking of new careers: I tried to become a famous rap star but it didn't work out. (See below) My nephew and I rap on a hip hop radio station. 

When Auntie Charmaine comes to town...let's just say my nephews are introduced to new experiences. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHwjL-tgPf8